


almost home, and you miss the bottom step

by greeneyescurlyfries (orphan_account)



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: (i'm not), ERICA IS CUTE BECAUSE THERE AINT ENOUGH CUTE!ERICA, I think I'm funny, IDK??????, Multi, They love each other, and lame, anyway ok, boyd is gr8, derek is a homebody, ha ha, i have a stupid fondness for jackson that i am (not) (slightly) ashamed of, i like attention, isaac and scott are cute, jackson is friendly (?????), lydia is a bamf but what else is new amirite, ok ok, platonic stiles/lydia, series-ish, wtf who am i kidding this is comedy gold
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-04-29
Updated: 2013-04-29
Packaged: 2017-12-09 21:38:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 858
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/778250
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/greeneyescurlyfries
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>a kinda sorta not interconnected series of domestic/fluffy/SOMETIMES PORNY pack life</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. one is laid on the floor and one is changing the locks on my door

**Author's Note:**

> /lays on the floor/

The 36,976th Derek brandishes “ _I'M THE ALPHA_ ,” Lydia whips around and (not) accidentally smacks Isaac in the face with the ends of her newly-highlighted layers, points at Derek, and says “No. Never again. You, Derek Chauncey Hale, will never again use that lame-ass excuse for your shitty decision-making abilities.”

 

Derek looks affronted, Stiles looks wonderingly at Lydia for being able to somehow wiggle Derek's middle name out of probably (definitely) sketchy sources, and Boyd busts out laughing.

 

Isaac spits a strawberry-blonde hair out of his mouth sadly and Erica throws a shoe at him.

 

Just as Derek begins to formulate some sort of sad comeback, Scott stumbles through the door of the half-finished Hale house and falls face-first on the threshold.

 

Stiles raises an eyebrow and Erica looks worried.

 

Scott heaves for a moment before spitting out, “More... witches...” then gets up and sticks a frozen pizza in the oven.

 

Derek groans and Lydia smirks. Jackson yells from the kitchen.

 

 

“Take that, Stilinski!”

 

Jackson is very competitive at Words with Friends.

 

“Jihad isn't even English! What the fuck, Jackson.”


	2. walks through the garden rows with her bare feet, laughing

Lydia stares boredly out the window of the small coffee shop where the new batch of witches had decided to declare no man's land, which doesn't even make sense, really, because the entire Beacon County is Hale territory, so what the fuck, witches.

 

The twentysomething blonde who calls herself Midnight Havoc but Lydia can tell by looking at her nails is absolutely a Tiffany starts laying down rules about borders and consequences and impending _doom_ and Lydia is 6,000% done with witches. Stiles is actually asleep beside her, and Tiff's buddy Pandemonium is leering at his eyelashes that are shadowing his cheekbones because apparently boys get all the luck when it comes to genetics.

 

Eventually Lydia gets a little sick of hearing “And my mother's mother shall lay curses from her grave and your family and your pets and livestock and crops shall wither and you'll wake up with Avril Lavigne lyrics tattooed on your forehead and _both_ butt cheeks” and cuts off Tiffy with a sharp “Listen here, Tiff, I have a lot to get done today and these nails won't manicure themselves, so let's cut to the chase: you're a liberal arts major who didn't want to live with her parents for the rest of her life and decided to get a job at a Dark Magic,” Lydia inserts aggressive jazz hands here, “store and now you've decided that it's a good idea to challenge an established, if rather hormonal, pack of werewolves and try to _take our land?_ Seriously, what the fuck, Tiffany. I will, however, give you a free pass to get the fuck out and leave us alone because three witch covens in a year is _annoying_. So this is good-bye. I hope you have much success at massage therapy school.”

 

Tiffany slumps a little, then shoves Pandemonium, gets up and orders another Berries 'n' Cream frappucino before getting the hell out of Dodge. Lydia works for an hour on her thesis before waking Stiles up and heading back to keep Scott and Isaac from adopting a puppy or a few Puerto Rican children or both.


	3. baby, we've come a long way

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wellllllllllllllllllllllllllll

 

 

Everybody is piled on the couch in Scott's basement trying to watch a movie, but Jackson keeps interrupting with embarrassingly funny comments about the plotline, Isaac keeps screaming about Derek and Stiles making out, which only happened _once_ , good God, Isaac, and Scott keeps burning the popcorn. Ms. McCall comes in halfway through to find Isaac firmly situated between Derek and Stiles, who are absolutely not playing footsie behind Isaac's ankles, Boyd making popcorn like it's supposed to be done, none of that shitty microwave stuff, thank you, _Scott_ , and Jackson and Erica laughing hysterically at the special effects on the screen. Sometimes they forget why they never let Isaac pick what to watch. Melissa sighs and looks to the heavens for support.

 

“Oh, hey, Aunt Melissa!” At some point Isaac had decided that everyone needed to call everyone some sort of family name, so Ms. McCall had become Aunt Melissa, and the Sheriff had briefly put up with Pops before Laying Down the Law, and Isaac had adjusted cheerfully to Uncle Sheriff, which Stiles finds weird and Scott finds hilarious, but seriously, fuck Scott.

 

Boyd offers _Aunt Melissa_ a bowl of popcorn, which she accepts gratefully before going to her room and fondly locking the door.

 

Derek sometimes wishes his room had a deadbolt and Stiles hadn't taught Erica how to pick locks.

 

Derek wishes this all the time.

 

But then something will make Stiles do that open-mouthed laugh where his nose scrunches up, or Erica will cuddle with Isaac on his mom's birthday, or Jackson will teach Boyd a few chords on the piano and he'll remember why they're renovating the house, and why he didn't move back to New York after the Alpha pack, and why he still, _still_ endures Pirahnaconda and Sharktopus marathons.

 

And in the middle of a scandalously boring slumber party complete with the most cliché game of truth or dare in the history of ever, Derek finds home again. 

**Author's Note:**

> WELL I DONT KNOW WHAT YOU WERE EXPECTING
> 
>  
> 
> review???? (KATHERINE IS NEEDY) snaps for reviewers
> 
> (i am a good bookmarker (so go check those out))
> 
> (idk that wasn't relevant but there is a special place in my heart for people who frequently bookmark wonderful fics)


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